Thanks for visiting...
This twig-ish looking symbol is one of my pen and ink drawings illustrating the dichotomy of bipolar disorder.
Life is sometimes like an abandonment of reason yet still within the confines of an ever evolving universe... climbing a tree looking for what will be found... finding reality fleeting and conditional... many times I have wished for perfect vision... that illusive venue into the WHY and HOW and what is what should never be.
<<< >>>
This website provides a means to publicly show some of my artwork and share some of my thoughts. If you sense that I am writing to hear myself write, you are correct. If you sense that I am attempting to make this interesting for you, you are correct.
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
This twig-ish looking symbol is one of my pen and ink drawings illustrating the dichotomy of bipolar disorder. Art - it is the person viewing that completes the picture
The stars are there for… seeing but not visiting? ... Please, do not tempt us with candy and place it beyond reach… is this our fate…? Is this our? Universe… beyond reach... beyond reason...?
I think the most important thing we have learned from extraterrestrial exploration is that Earth teems with life like no other planet in our solar system. But whether you believe the universe sprang out of nothing, is infinite, or was designed out of nothing, it is difficult… near impossible, after looking out into the incredible vastness of the heavens, not to imagine more life elsewhere in the universe. But what if there isn't advanced life outside of Earth? What if we are alone in this awesome and inspiring cosmos? And even if there is life elsewhere, how would we get to it/them if/when we discover evidence? This is a disheartening question for those of us who grew up imagining space travel to distant galaxies and have since been faced with relativity. Travel to even our nearest (and lifeless) stellar neighbor is well beyond a reasonably attainable human journey. Astronomers measure stellar distances in "light years"... how far light travels in one year (time instead of kilometers or miles). The distance light travels in one hour is 1,079,252,848.8 kilometers. So multiply 8,760 hours (a non-leap year) times 1,079,252,848.8 kilometers to find the km distance for one light year... a whopping big number. Sadly, Einstein’s general relativity theory tells us that the universal speed limit for objects with mass such as spacecraft is just below the speed of light. And so far, the speed record for space travel is just a meager fraction of that speed. So unless we are somehow able to actually build a much faster spaceship and unless Einstein’s theory is debunked, we are resolved to only dream about traveling even to the closest neighboring star which currently happens to be Proxima Centauri at about 4.2 light years distant. But these space travelling dreams so many of us have likely indicate possibility. I believe we look and outreach with hope to the heavens because that is in our nature. I also believe in the design aspect of the universe and it would be disappointing, to say the least, for the Designer not to accommodate this dream someday… how that dream is fulfilled… who can say? Perhaps we will reach the outer stars from a second Earth. Perhaps this second Earth will have new and different physics? What is impossible in this universe may be possible in the next. Or is it just a dream?
Life’s flame burns like fusion
Propagating emotion like starlit nebulae
What of God’s creatures can hide from its beckoning?
To the stars… to the heavens… onward outward… ever reaching
For love’s reward
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Space Traveler
Acrylic on acetate with a background photograph
My rendition of Ed White's 1965 spacewalk... I like to imagine that's me in the spacesuit... I painted this around 1977 and the work was a gift to one of my dearest friends with an intended subliminal message to 'look at me, I am in control of my universe!' What a farse!
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Portal
Christmas 2007 - This is my first drawing (digital art*) image using my new digitizing drawing tablet. (*Wacom Intuos3 tablet and Microsoft Paint)
This freehand drawing was partiallly inspired by an Astronomy Picture of the Day. The APOD image reminded me of a portal... possibly a portal into Heaven. If you study the APOD M17 image, you may see the imagery I'm talking about. I can see a figure looking back from the "portal" and wonder if you might too.
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Log Cabin Church
I discovered this church in 1973 and painted this acrylic watercolor around 1980.
I had the pleasure of visiting Sunday school and services in spring 2004. This church is located in Smyrna, GA USA just outside of Atlanta. The original church was held in the small log cabin. Now it is a Sunday school classroom.
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Fireworks
I like to call this Watercolor Fireworks. This is one of three "storyboard" paintings.
I love dragons! I have always been fascinated with the symbolism.
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Happy Dragons
Acrylic on acetate - This 1977 abstract painting started out as a sketch of a drawer handle and evolved.
If you look closely at the center of the image you will see two separate heads merging together to form a third... the two looking toward the center and the one looking at you, three perspectives from one source... I was thinking of how the union of two people in marriage makes one.
<<<<<<< >>>>>>>
Manic Depression
Pen and Ink
The lower left end of the image (an upside down charicature of a human head) represents depressed thinking... the upper right end of the image (an upside up charicature of a dragon) is representing racing thoughts. The common thread between the two opposite extremes is the indivi-dual experiencing the dual (bipolar) disorder. Next time you read the book of Isaiah, consider the interesting and apparent "bipolar" conditions of his writing.
Mental disorders are sometimes associated with genetics but can also be created by childhood environmental conditions. A disordered behavioral condition can be exposed in later years spawned by emotional stress and a lifetime of dealing privately with childhood issues.
Many people grow up dealing with disorders and may or may not be aware of their condition. And with age, it can become more and more difficult to control a mentally disordered condition without outside help. For example, bipolar disorder can develop over time and become extreme when the individual is under excessive stress. Originally known as manic depression, bipolar disorder symptoms, as I already mentioned, are comprised of racing thoughts and depressed thinking.
‘Racing thoughts’ are when thoughts seem to have a life of their own. At its worse, it feels like someone else is controlling the brain… this can be very painful mentally as well as physically, kind of like sitting in the pilot’s seat of a jet aircraft with an array of external remote controlling operators deciding where, what and how fast the plane will go and each operator has a different flight plan fighting for control. This extremely unpleasant condition can be horrifying and bewildering at the same time. It could be comparable to watching a suspenseful horror movie that does not make sense or provide a break in the tension. Sometimes the racing thoughts can be more vivid, even pleasant and make perfect sense to the individual but not to other people.
Depressed thinking can be even more serious in that it sometimes leads to suicide. To the depressed individual, life can seem too much to bear. At its worse, death appears to be relief. At its least, depression stifles the pleasure of everyday life and initiates a negative inward focus. Kind of like wanting to bury one's head in the sand. Depression takes the individual away from interacting with others, even loved ones.
At both extreme states of racing thoughts and depressed thinking, the individual needs medical support and guidance from outside. Reallizing that the manic and depressed thinking can be controlled with medication and is therefore not permanent is very important, especially to the afflicted. This positive aspect provides the hope needed for stability and control.
A big problem for the disordered individual can be denial or pride. One issue can be the desire to try and hide the abnormal thinking because of the fear that people will react negatively (an unfortunate byproduct of our prideful culture). Having a caring and stable home life can be a great advantage. Family or friend’s support is critical for the disordered person. Managing disorders becomes much easier with people that love you and want to help. But it is even more important that the afflicted desire to help themselves. The best help ultimately comes from within.
Like bipolar disorder, faith and doubt pervade my conscious. I often wonder if my faith is manifested by the desire to know God. (My religion is true because I want it to be true)... I also wonder if my religious doubts are simply a byproduct of my aspiration to be "right thinking".
<<<<<<< Home >>>>>>>